Saturday, November 20, 2010

Thank You

Amanda and I wanted to say thank you. We've said it when we could, but overall, phone calls aren't always returned and many emails have gone unreplied. It's sometimes a choice between sleep or emails, between sitting down for awhile in silence or making a phone call. I sometimes feel bad about that, but I know it's ok and that people aren't expecting prompt responses.

It's easy to forget how many people are connected to you, even if only marginally. Mid-October, Julia was sitting comfortably in her web, happy and seemingly healthy. Then life took hold of the strand tied to her health and gave it a yank. It was jarring at first and it hurt, her physically and us emotionally. Her because it was her strand and us because our web is ever so tied to hers. But then something interesting happened. When Julia's thread snapped back, unbroken but reverberating violently, the vibrations flew outward in every direction. First these ripples encountered family and close friends, then outward to many groups of people: the staff at Children's Hospital, my coworkers at UWRF, Amanda's coworkers and students at Oltman Middle School, the staff at Westside Elementary and Julia's classmates, Rocky Branch Elementary, St. Bridget's and other churches, the RF Moms' and Dads' group, our daycare family, our neighbors, and others only connected to us by the thinnest of silky threads but with enough of a connection where they heard and were touched by Julia's cancer diagnosis. Amanda and I were amazed and continue to be amazed at how far out a six-year-old's little web could reach and how those connections could mean so much to us.

A lot of people have offered help and we haven't had the opportunity to be able to accept much of it. In theses first few weeks we just don't know what we need. Radiation will soon be done and we should be able to settle into a more normal routine. After that we should have a better idea of the areas of our life that are missing attention. So one request I have is that anyone who has expressed interest in helping out in some way and still wants to do so later, should ask us again in three weeks or six weeks or a few months. And if we tell you that we're doing fine and don't need anything, try to believe that it's the truth and not because we're too proud to accept the help (and we'll try to accept the help that we need!).

A lot of people have asked about giving us meals to ease that portion of our daily lives. Some kind folks set up an online place for people to go to sign up for a time to bring us something. I know that the link has been spread around through some circles but not everywhere yet, so I thought I would share it here:

Your continued positive thoughts are appreciated, your prayers are welcomed, and your gracious offers of help will be accepted if needed and forever acknowledged if not.


Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for the updates on this blog. Your words are so well written and helpful. I wanted to say that it is so great having Julia back to school at Westside. Her smile is so contagious and her love of school is so evident. Julia has been such a trooper at school and she just loves coming.I hope this weekend brings some well deserved rest for all! Know that you are always in my thoughts and prayers.

Your 1st Grade teacher.
Mrs Andersen

Duane said...

Torey and Mandy:

WOW --- Well said!

You are such great role models for Julia and Finn. Love and prayers to Julia, the immediate Kauth-Jagodzinski families, all of our friends and Julia's health providers. ~ Gr.Duane & Gr.Beth

Anonymous said...

Eloquently said Torey. You and Mandy should be proud of yourselves for the way both of you are handling this situation. We know it has been extremely hard. Know that we are a phone call away if you need help or just a chat. We are so very proud of you as a father, husband, and son. Love to you, Mom and Dad

Aunt Cheryl said...

I know exactly what you are expressing here Torey! With having my own health setbacks and Zach's scary accident this past summer, sometimes "silence is golden". A stone(boulder), in the road of life such as this "takes the wind right out of your sails". Please take the time to rest when you can, share special moments together, and trust that Faith will help you through. God will create these family moments together so the rest of us can smother out the despair. I know in the past that as a family you have been "paying it forward" to others. Well, this is now your time to receive. There is a reason that your family is supported by so many. You are both excellent parents!
Love & Blessings.....Aunt Cheryl